Category Archives: Uncategorized

Excerpt from the Wikipedia plot synopsis: “Annelle also swears that her personal tragedy will never be able to interfere with her ability to do good hair. Shelby then agrees that Annelle will come to her wedding ‘and have some bleedin’ … Continue reading →

Found the following equation in a probability book (so q=1-p): p(1 + q + q² + q³ + …) = p(1/(1-q)) Er … wha? ‘Splain this to me.

Scientific American says that “our brains have a map for numbers” ….

Query: SELECT fname, lname, hire_date FROM EMPLOYEES WHERE DATEDIFF(yy, hire_date,GETDATE()+30) > DATEDIFF(yy, hire_date,GETDATE()) Function: Returns the name and hire date of all employees whose hire-date anniversaries fall within the next thirty days. The DATEDIFF() method returns the difference, in units … Continue reading →

Following Mr. Smith’s bogus data led me down gloomy and tortuous paths to an illegal smoke-filled basement casino in Chinatown at 3 AM. The place was packed, but this time I at least had a photo: Mr. Smith’s unblinking psychotic … Continue reading →

Query: SELECT fname, lname, hire_date FROM EMPLOYEES WHERE CAST(CAST(YEAR(GETDATE()) AS varchar(4))+ SUBSTRING(CONVERT(char(8), hire_date,112),5,4) AS datetime) BETWEEN GETDATE() AND GETDATE()+30 Function: Attempts to determine hire date anniversaries for all employees that fall within the next thirty days (the anniversaries, not the … Continue reading →

Query: SELECT t.name AS TableName, SCHEMA_NAME(schema_id) AS SchemaName, c.name AS ColumnName FROM sys.tables AS t INNER JOIN sys.columns c ON t.OBJECT_ID = c.OBJECT_ID WHERE c.name LIKE ‘%Hi-Keeba%’ ORDER BY SchemaName, TableName Function: Finds any value in any column in any … Continue reading →

Query: SELECT name FROM Deep13.sys.tables WHERE name like ‘%Forrester%’ Function: Find all the tables in the database Deep13 with the string Forrester in the name. Source: Me. This is helpful if you’re looking around a database with hundreds/thousands of tables … Continue reading →

Query: CREATE TABLE EMPLOYEES ( enumber int NOT NULL, lname char(30) NOT NULL, fname char(30) NOT NULL, hire_date datetime NOT NULL) GO INSERT INTO EMPLOYEES VALUES(1,’Bot’,’Cam’,’1988-11-24 09:29:01.303′) GO INSERT INTO EMPLOYEES VALUES(2,’Sy’,’Gyp’,’1988-11-24 09:29:02.303′) GO INSERT INTO EMPLOYEES VALUES(3,’Servo’,’Tom’,’1988-11-24 09:29:03.303′) GO … Continue reading →

I once took a class in Uncreative Writing. We mostly used phrases like “Contains polydihydrogenated monosulfinaluminated xanthanascorbinalates.”